Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Gomen ne...

My little brother is coming to town for school holidays work. Got him a job as promoter at Giordano outlet. I’m the one who suggested him to come to town for exposure. And now, I'm pissed off with myself.

All the while, I’ve been so used to lone-ranger lifestyle, attached with a “burden” suddenly, I’m so unused with it. Shouldn’t have called it as “burden” as it's too heavy to carry my meaning. Moreover, I should take the responsibility to taking care of him. What I can do for him are only arranging transportation, accommodation, bla bla bla…mama was so worry with her youngest child going to town for work. Aware of my frustration, she told me that this would be my last responsibility that I could offer for my little brother as other siblings are grown up and having their own life.

Thinking back of it, I have reacted too much. Either he or mama was so innocent to be my blame. If he were to know how to arrange his everything, would my assistance still needed here? What a typical sister have I become?! Too bad...sighing… I realized how selfish I am from the whole scenario – no wonder I’m born to be alone!!! I apologise on the irritation I have burst out during these whole period since he got the offer.

So sorry, my mama and little brother, and thanks for the endurance. Gomen ne…

2 comments:

ting said...

当我们的身份和生活习惯稍微有点变化的时候,难免会觉得难以胜任。 人长大了,就要改变被人照顾的习惯,然后代替长辈去照顾比我们年轻的小辈。一样的,有一天我们年老了,我们也一样期待我们的儿女会互相照应。哥哥爱护妹妹,姐姐照顾弟弟, 天经地义。

我们都在学习成长。当你做了人家的太太, 才学习怎样当人家的小婶,舅母或媳妇。 我们怀念当一个小女孩,天塌下来有爸妈去顶。可是爸妈会老,也该享老了,小小的一点负担,用不着太压力自己去完美的去执行。太周到的照顾弟弟,只会宠出另一个不会照顾自己的小辈而已。

要锻炼会捕鱼的渔夫,不是给他很多鱼,而是教他怎样捕鱼。

joeyeo said...

好一番人生哲学啊!空间太大了,还待学习。。。

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